Supporting Your Partner with Interstitial Cystitis

By Kristi Patrice Carter

Intestitial cystitis, or painful bladder syndrome, is a disruptive and frustrating medical condition for the individual and their family. People who have interstitial cystitis is an inflammation of the bladder that largely effects women. It is recognized that living with interstitial cystitis is difficult for the patient, but this condition also has a significant impact on the rest of the family, especially the spouse who wants to support their partner. What can they do in order to support their partner with interstitial cystitis?

People who have interstitial cystitis frequently need to use the bathroom, even at night. This may mean that they cannot sleep through the night because of a constant need to urinate or the pain associated with an inflamed bladder. This, of course, will disrupt the sleep of a partner. If nighttime sleep does not occur, you and your partner may need to change your schedules, including your sleep schedule. Many people find that sleeping during the day is much easier than at night. This is one small change that may make a big difference.

You can also support your partner by making any dietary changes with them. It is best to reduce the amount of acid in the patient’s diet in order to make them more comfortable. This means no citrus or citrus juice, and no coffee, tea, chocolate, carbonated beverages, or spicy foods. There may be other trigger foods as well. Once those are identified, make sure that you keep those trigger foods out of your home in order to help your partner avoid any temptation.

Your sex life will most likely be disrupted as well. Most people who have interstitial cystitis experience significant pain during intercourse. For this reason, these individuals often avoid sex. This can put a serious strain on a romantic relationship. If this does occur, do not take this personally. Your partner does love you, but cannot express that love physically. You can be supportive by being understanding and finding other ways to maintain intimacy with your partner.

At times, your partner will be experiencing an extreme amount of pain. This can put a lot of stress on an individual. As a result, they may lash out or be short with a person without meaning to be offensive or hurtful. It can be difficult as a partner to maintain a positive attitude and not become defensive when one feels they are being attacked. However, instigating a fight will only make the situation worse. 

The most important thing to remember when supporting a partner with interstitial cystitis is that your partner needs your understanding more than they can ever express. This is the most powerful tool you can offer your partner.